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You've probably met at least one, or, if you've worked in a kitchen, been at least one of them.
This fun post from Buzzfeed, which we have summarised and shared with you below, identifies nine types of cooks who work in fine dining restaurants, from the tattoo-covered fine dining bro, to the drill sergeant, the chef de partayyy to the Ferran Adria-obsessed alchemist.
So, which type of cook are you?
1. The Fine Dining Bro
They are covered with tattoos of juniper, whisks and pork cuts, and always carry tweezers. They are found in gastropubs, pop-up events, and farm-to-table institutions. They love to cook sous vide, Asian fusion, tapas with a modern twist, and any dish with a quenelle. They strongly believe in preserving the natural beauty of the ingredients.
Favourite phrase: "The white space in the dish gives the food a way to breathe"
2. The Drill Sergeant
They don't talk, they scream. They are convinced that a brigade is driven by fear, and that the best way to strengthen the team is to "Break it down to build it." They love to pick up the vegetable waste you are throwing away and show you that you can make a vegetable stock to teach you a lesson.
Favourite phrase: "Cooking students no longer have a working ethics!"
3. The Newly Graduated
They arrive 20 minutes in advance dressed in their full (and starched) uniform. They always suggest alternative methods based on what they've learnt at school. Their latest Google searches include "choux dough portions" and "how to repay student debt."
Favourite phrase: "I've been here for three months and have not yet become a sous chef. How is it possible?"
4. The Procrastinator
They keep repeating that the kitchen is just a temporary thing for them, before they find a real job. 10 years later they will still be in charge of the grill, preparing the same dishes, and will continue to say that that the job is a joke.
Favourite phrase: "I'm not really a cook"
5. The Preacher
They spend time teaching their colleagues. Their Dutch sauce is always the best, their cleanest pans, their method of bringing out the most effective dirt. Any dish you are preparing, they know how to do better or have a trick to suggest. My favorite phrase: "Let me see how you play a potato"
6. The Corporate Chef
They work nine to five. They have different colour cutting boards for different foods – red for meat, blue for fish, no exceptions – but the kitchen tool they use most is the microwave. Fine dining colleagues say they've sold out. Find them at airports or in hotels. Their signature dish is a chocolate pie with whipped cream, mint leaves and raspberries.
Favourite phrase: "When I was in New York I was working eight days a week!"
7. The Alchemist
They are obsessed with molecular cooking and try to apply it in restaurant they work. They always carry mini-scales and other strange gadgets. They ferret, deconstruct, and extract the essence. They strongly believe in the idea of chicken salad.
Favourite phrase: "What if we turned it into a foam?"
8. Chef de Partayyy
They are not necessarily chef de parties, but they definitely know how to party. They arrive hungover and survive on adrenalin, a water bottle always by their side. They wear Crocs.
Favourite phrase: "Anyone up for a shift drink?"
9. The Martyr
They never take a break and do double, triple and quadruple shifts, but then constantly complain about how much they work. They claim fron t of house never do enough.
Favourite phrase: "Anything for you, chef."